What Would You Say to Freshman You?

I’m not a massive fan of dwelling on the past. Mostly because I get sad when I remember how much Cookout and Chick-fil-A I’ve eaten and then my arteries start yelling at me. If you like that frosted lemonade as much as I do, then I know you understand.  We’re in this together.

The past can be a great way to learn, though. Not just about how to care for your arteries, but about life. Austin Kleon said in his book Steal Like an Artist that “All advice is autobiographical.” I think he’s on to something. Much of the advice we give to others is rooted in our own experience.

I’ve loved my time in college. It’s been some of the best years of my life. I don’t have many regrets, but I’ve definitely learned some things over the past few years that I would absolutely go back and tell the 18 year-old me.

You?

What would you say to the freshman version of you? When you look back on your early college days, what would you have done differently?

If I could go back to the summer of 2012 and talk to incoming freshman Caleb, here are a few things I would say.

1) Jump!  Don’t tip toe. 

I once heard the RUF pastor at UGA give some great advice to freshmen entering college.  He said, “Don’t be afraid to cut ties with your hometown. Seriously. Really lean into life here at UGA and be all in.”

What he’s not saying: Never call your parents and forget about all your high school friends and don’t you dare think about going home even once this semester!  Missing your family is for pansies!  

What he is saying: The sooner you fully jump into this new thing called college, the easier it will be to build community, adjust academically, and establish a solid foundation for the next four years of your life. 

To sum it up, I didn’t do that in a lot of ways- especially my first semester. I took baby steps into college, went home way too much, and didn’t plug in as fast as I should have.

I’m convinced that if I had “jumped in” sooner, I would have begun to really love college much faster.  It honestly took me until halfway through my sophomore year to really love Athens and UGA. So yeah. Don’t tip toe. Jump!

2) Get out and explore!

College is just the weirdest. Don’t believe me?

Then answer me this:  Name another time in life when you can wake up at 9am, get all-you-can-eat bacon and eggs, go learn about marketing, then go learn about organic gardening, then go take a boxing class, then eat lunch, then sit in an eno hammock and look over what you’ve learned about marketing and organic gardening, then get coffee with a friend, then eat dinner, then go swing dancing, then go to sleep and call it an average day.

I’ll wait as you ponder that.

While you’re pondering, I’ll go out on a limb and say that there isn’t. There’s no other time in life with such weirdness and awesomeness colliding all at once. Take advantage of it!

Netflix will be there for you after you graduate. Boxing classes won’t. Eno-ing in the middle of a weekday day won’t. (Unless you know of a company that let’s you get your work done in enos in which case I’ll be submitting my resume promptly.)

For most of my freshman year, I felt the pressure to figure everything out within the first semester.  My friends, major, clubs, ministries, etc. etc. Trying to get everything nailed down perfect in the first four months is like me trying out for The Voice and winning it all. Take some time in your first year to explore all the interesting things college has to offer.

3) Pursue authentic community with everything you’ve got.  

I like to say that I’m an ambivert- somewhere between an introvert and an extrovert. But if I’m honest, I’m a little more of an introvert at heart. I don’t advertise it much, and I’ve gotten pretty good at hiding it. I love speaking in front of lots of people and when I’m in a crowd, I know how to “turn it on” and “mingle like a single” and “work the crowd” like it’s my job. (I just made that ‘mingle like a single’ phrase up on the spot. I’m pretty sure it’s 100% original. You’re welcome.)

All these things shout ‘extrovert!’ but it’s true nonetheless- I get a little more energy from time alone or in one-on-one conversations or in small groups. I even get nervous sometimes when I show up to places where I may not know people. Ugh!

In my view, one of the keys to building the foundation for an awesome time in college is the community you choose to be a part of.  So even if you’re slightly introverted like me, learn to be social for the sake of pursuing community. Don’t sit around and hope it shows up at your doorstep. It won’t. Don’t sit around and hope a few extraverted friends bring you along for the ride. Chase after community. Find people who share your core beliefs, challenge you, and speak truth into your life.

4) Learn to follow.  

We all know that dude who’s always chillin’ with his bros and is never in class. We also know the person who we never see anywhere but in the library. And then of course there’s the go-getter-change-the-world-be-president-of-everything who’s all about leading his or her student organization. I came in as #3.

Like one time my freshman year, I applied to be the VP of a new club within the business school that I literally knew nothing about. I also showed up to just about every networking event. Then some friends who were all seniors invited me to help them start this conference thing called ONE2, and I was frustrated because I thought that I didn’t have enough responsibility or a cool enough title. ‘Cause you know, doing cool things is all about having a cool title, right?

Yeah, I was that guy. That go-getter freshman who thought he was just the coolest cat, er… I mean dawg.

I eventually realized how prideful I had become in my own strength- the temptation to think that I could make it on my own.

I would tell freshman me to focus on becoming a good follower. Which, ironically, is a huge prerequisite for learning how to be an authentic servant-leader. By looking at Jesus himself, the only person in history with the right to think himself better than others, we see a man graciously serving others, speaking truth, humbling himself, and even dying for his enemies (i.e. prideful people like me).

5) Be in the scriptures daily.  

For freshman me, I cannot overstate this enough. I’d liken time in the scriptures to being more important than a meal. Chiefly because this is how we get to know the true God, and not simply a god of our own imagination. We’re both challenged and comforted. Offended and attracted. Through the lens of the gospel, we see things as they really are. In the words of Tim Keller, “We realize that we are far worse than we could ever imagine, but far more loved than we ever dared hope.”

So there ya go. The 5 things I’d say to freshman Caleb. What would you say to freshman you?